They paved paradise and put up a parking lot

Don't it always seem to go

That you don't know what you got till it's gone

 

And so it was today. I won’t win any self analysis awards for stating that my head rules my heart, but was that a speck of dust in my eye last night during the first of the team goodbyes?

The moment when I really felt it, however, was when I stepped alone into Dinoop’s autorick this morning. The fraction of a second of joy at the thought of being able to sit anywhere rather than my usual right hand flank was soon replaced by the reality.

The fellowship of the autorick had been disbanded. 

Pieces of my heart were traveling to the US and Brazil, leaving an emotional gap as big as the physical gap. I’m not going to attempt to describe Cat and Rafael. Those of you lucky enough to call them friends will already know what makes them wonderful people, and those of you who don’t know would only be jealous.

I’m going to attempt to describe how I have benefited from being fortunate enough to have shared this special time with them. (Hey - just call me self-centred, ok?).

I’m going to channel Rafael when I fear speaking up in a social setting. The Mike that sits and reflects and analyses and shares himself in measured doses via carefully constructed blog statements has found a new personal confidence coach. Rafael is now forever in my heart and head, booming encouragement to not be afraid to give voice to what I think and feel. Speak up little lizard. 

Rafa – what can I say? I’ve made my decision – I’m a Corinthians fan.

One of my favourite memories that relates to Rafael was when we presented to a group of volunteers interested in becoming mentors to micro-enterprises. Seeing Rafael, who taught himself English, delivering his message and connecting with his audience was inspiring for me. 

Rafael is a hard act to follow, but I think Cat may have pulled it off. When I need a bit more zest in my life, there is a wealth of memories to recall as Cat’s showed her love for life in India. The most recent example being of Cat with Jana at the final dinner:  Bollywood dancing in vibrant saris and laughing outrageously - a wonderful reminder of the importance of fun, friendships and a sense of adventure. More than this, Cat reminded me of the importance of balance. There was laughter from the short chats during the autorick rides, but there was comfort in the silent observation of the world passing by also. 

I loved the camaraderie that resulted from working together with Cat and Rafael to deliver the incubation model for NBF. Having pieces of my heart now dispersed around the globe hasn’t damaged my heart. 

My heart has grown bigger, and I’m the better person for it.

[The music in the hotel foyer right now as I'm about to click publish and head to the airport for my trip home is.... "In my heart, forever"... the beat's a bit odd, but the sentiment is noted]